Marriage

 

I have always agreed with the writer of Proverbs 30 when he says one of the things that amazes him the most in this life is the way a man loves a woman… but now I think there’s something even more amazing.

When Pete pursued me as a young college student I was bewildered by his persistence, and ultimately by his love.  Why would a strong, independent young buck like him want to spend time with, and be bound to, a weaker, neurotic, angsty, overthinking girl like me?  I know I brought all kinds of complication, noise, and confusion into his life.  Plus then I brought him kids – which made our lives exponentially more complicated, noisy and confusing.

But as crazy as that love was back then, I have found something that is even more amazing: a man sticking around and loving his wife as she ages.  I have added many wrinkles and pounds to the original package Pete signed up for, and perhaps even greater neuroticism and angsty-ness.  And even though he goes to work every day at a place where there are over a thousand cute young girls with their sweet dispositions, short shorts, and wide eyes, he still comes home to me every night.  He knows that some nights he will come home to a wife who is fuming, and some nights he will come home to a loud din of chaos, and sometimes I will be in despair and taking it out on him, and sometimes I will be quietly annoyed and he will be mystified.  Yet he loves.

Pete doesn’t need me to cook or clean – he knows how to do all those things.  He can even iron his own shirts, I am ashamed to admit.  This was the one domestic thing I tried to do for him as an act of love, but even that one got away from me when he (ridiculously) started wearing ironable shirts every day for work.  So he irons.  He runs errands, he puts gas in the cars, he does the yard work and keeps track of all the dumb insurance stuff.  So there’s not a whole lot of help that I bring to the equation.  He loves me anyway.

Perhaps the writer of Proverbs had not yet lived long enough to witness or experience middle-aged love, but I feel like he may have amended verse 18 of chapter 30 if he did.  The only thing more amazing than a man loving a young woman, is a man loving an old one.