The thing about keeping record of our family life in a format such as this is that it's easy to just touch on the highlights and fun things. But lest I someday look back at all this and think "oh, weren't those years so lovely and perfect?" I am going to take this opportunity to remind myself that there were also not-so-happy days. And yesterday was one of them.
Really, in the grand scheme of life, yesterday was really quite good: everyone is healthy, safe, and provided for. So, compared to many, many people, I know we have a wonderful life and yesterday is not an exception by any means. Compared to my other days, though, yesterday was not one a preferable one.
To begin with, Pete is gone (yet again) on a trip, and over the 15 evenings before our Thanksgiving trip, he is/was working or just "out" for 10 of them. So I'm already at the end of my patience rope. And, I started yesterday on 6 hours of sleep (definitely far below my needed amount), and my hormones were having a wacky heyday. Not a good foundation for anyone's happy day.
Add to this a harried trip up to my mom's church an hour away where I then tried to keep both Rayna and Colsen quiet for an hour, a trip to a restaurant where I didn't get to eat a single bite because I was occupied the entire time with getting the kids' food into them and/or taking them to the bathroom, a broken dishwasher which means I now spend literally hours of my day washing dishes, Colsen's messed up nap schedule, and a daughter who doesn't hear a single thing I say suddenly, and I was not a happy person. Thankfully my neighbor came over for dinner last night which I realized was just the buffer my kids needed between their potential-screaming-banshee mother and them.
I was counting down the minutes to bedtime last night, and just as I had gotten everyone ready for bed and we had read the last story and I was getting the stuff out to make Colsen a quick bottle......
... the protein powder container came open in my hand (thanks to Colsen and Rayna playing with it earlier in the day) and powder flew everywhere. Everywhere. Floor, chairs, counters, walls, and all over the items in the bottom 2 shelves of my pantry. All 3 kids had to see what was going on of course, and in my state of temporary shut-down caused by extreme despair, I didn't catch them quick enough and they started walking all through it. What a great end to the day.
Of course I eventually got to bed, but then this was my night:
10:45 or 11: fall asleep
12:45 Wake up to Colsen crying. Since he shares a room with Strider, this can only go on so long. So eventually I went in to get him and bring him in my room.
2:00: Wake up to Rayna telling me she needs to go to the bathroom. This wakes up Colsen, too, so I am carrying him around on my hip while trying to help her and get her back to bed.
2:45: Fall back asleep
4:15: Wake up to Colsen crying. From history (374 nights of it to be exact), I know that this cry will not end until he is fed. So I feed him.
6:40: Wake up to Colsen climbing on me. Thankfully this is later than yesterday morning, but still not late enough!
So, there you go Future Me. These years were not all blissfully happy and easy. But I'm still thankful for them.
Really, in the grand scheme of life, yesterday was really quite good: everyone is healthy, safe, and provided for. So, compared to many, many people, I know we have a wonderful life and yesterday is not an exception by any means. Compared to my other days, though, yesterday was not one a preferable one.
To begin with, Pete is gone (yet again) on a trip, and over the 15 evenings before our Thanksgiving trip, he is/was working or just "out" for 10 of them. So I'm already at the end of my patience rope. And, I started yesterday on 6 hours of sleep (definitely far below my needed amount), and my hormones were having a wacky heyday. Not a good foundation for anyone's happy day.
Add to this a harried trip up to my mom's church an hour away where I then tried to keep both Rayna and Colsen quiet for an hour, a trip to a restaurant where I didn't get to eat a single bite because I was occupied the entire time with getting the kids' food into them and/or taking them to the bathroom, a broken dishwasher which means I now spend literally hours of my day washing dishes, Colsen's messed up nap schedule, and a daughter who doesn't hear a single thing I say suddenly, and I was not a happy person. Thankfully my neighbor came over for dinner last night which I realized was just the buffer my kids needed between their potential-screaming-banshee mother and them.
I was counting down the minutes to bedtime last night, and just as I had gotten everyone ready for bed and we had read the last story and I was getting the stuff out to make Colsen a quick bottle......
... the protein powder container came open in my hand (thanks to Colsen and Rayna playing with it earlier in the day) and powder flew everywhere. Everywhere. Floor, chairs, counters, walls, and all over the items in the bottom 2 shelves of my pantry. All 3 kids had to see what was going on of course, and in my state of temporary shut-down caused by extreme despair, I didn't catch them quick enough and they started walking all through it. What a great end to the day.
Of course I eventually got to bed, but then this was my night:
10:45 or 11: fall asleep
12:45 Wake up to Colsen crying. Since he shares a room with Strider, this can only go on so long. So eventually I went in to get him and bring him in my room.
2:00: Wake up to Rayna telling me she needs to go to the bathroom. This wakes up Colsen, too, so I am carrying him around on my hip while trying to help her and get her back to bed.
2:45: Fall back asleep
4:15: Wake up to Colsen crying. From history (374 nights of it to be exact), I know that this cry will not end until he is fed. So I feed him.
6:40: Wake up to Colsen climbing on me. Thankfully this is later than yesterday morning, but still not late enough!
So, there you go Future Me. These years were not all blissfully happy and easy. But I'm still thankful for them.
No comments:
Post a Comment