The past few weeks I've had to be gone during the evenings a lot -- either working, or at gatherings with friends. Last Thursday when Strider overheard me talking to Pete about my plans for that night, he said, "You're going to be gone AGAIN? You've been gone every night this week!"
I was immediately sympathetic and turned to him, asking, "Oh, Strider, I'm sorry. You don't like it when I'm gone this much? Do you miss me when I'm gone?"
I was earnestly hoping for a sweet moment of bonding with my son, in which he told me how much he loves me and appreciates me and how the house just isn't the same when the light of his mother is gone from it.
Instead, I got "No.... when you're gone we can't watch "The Rookie!"
Lately we've been watching that movie. When I saw it was going to be on TV, I thought I would tape it, envisioning a very pleasant evening with the whole family happily watching it, and then discussing the uplifting themes and important messages that it portrays.
As it turned out we had to watch it over a span of about 6 or 7 different evenings because each time we sat down we rarely got past about 15 minutes of it. Our viewings normally started out with 4 of us all snuggled together on the couch, and Colsen on top of us, bounding over each of us in turn as he kept trying to get the remote.
Then we would hit play, watch about 27 seconds, then hit pause so Strider could go to the bathroom. Then play for 16 more seconds, then pause because we had to remove Colsen from the top of a piece of furniture where he was dancing trying to get our attention. Play for 48 more seconds, then pause while Rayna asks a question. Play for 17 more seconds until the phone rings with a call that Pete has to take concerning something important. Play... pause no one can hear since Colsen is screaming his head off. Play while I go into the kitchen to get Colsen some milk.
Pause when I discover neither Strider nor Rayna finished their milk from dinner and it's still in cups on the counter. Play.... oh wait, now it's bedtime!
So we did this over several nights, but we finally finished it.
As I said, I had hoped this would spark all kinds of good family discussion about morals and values and other such things. However, the conversations ended up going slightly different than I expected...
At one point the coach (Jim Morris) is trying to make a significant point and he concludes by saying something to the effect of, "After all, there is more to life than baseball!" Amen, I thought! Let's talk about what's more important than sports! At the next "pause" opportunity (4 seconds later) I asked Strider what he thought about that statement.
"Of course there is!" he said. (I was relieved to hear him say that)
But....then he followed it up with... "Like Football!"
Then later in the movie, Jim Morris is struggling over his decision about whether or not to accept an offer to play on a real baseball team (minor league). He knows that if he goes, it will mean being away from his family for long stretches, and leaving a lot of responsibility on his wife. But, since playing in the big leagues has always been his true dream, he is in a quandary. We asked Strider what he thought about all that, wondering how he would weigh it out, what he would advise Jim Morris, etc. But all we got was, "He shoulda never got married!" (further cementing a long-standing resolution he's had that he will never get married)
Rayna, meanwhile, was pretty absent from our conversations about the meanings of the movie, since she got lost at the beginning when Jimmy was a boy, and then grew up to be a man.
Throughout the next several nights of the movie viewing she kept asking, "Where's Jimmy? That's Jimmy?" Too mind-blowing for her.
So my hopes and dreams of having meaningful conversations and bonding time over this movie did not come to fruition. I guess I should have had a more realistic view of the ages and stages of people within our family.
Oh well -- rookie mistake. :)
I was immediately sympathetic and turned to him, asking, "Oh, Strider, I'm sorry. You don't like it when I'm gone this much? Do you miss me when I'm gone?"
I was earnestly hoping for a sweet moment of bonding with my son, in which he told me how much he loves me and appreciates me and how the house just isn't the same when the light of his mother is gone from it.
Instead, I got "No.... when you're gone we can't watch "The Rookie!"
Lately we've been watching that movie. When I saw it was going to be on TV, I thought I would tape it, envisioning a very pleasant evening with the whole family happily watching it, and then discussing the uplifting themes and important messages that it portrays.
As it turned out we had to watch it over a span of about 6 or 7 different evenings because each time we sat down we rarely got past about 15 minutes of it. Our viewings normally started out with 4 of us all snuggled together on the couch, and Colsen on top of us, bounding over each of us in turn as he kept trying to get the remote.
Then we would hit play, watch about 27 seconds, then hit pause so Strider could go to the bathroom. Then play for 16 more seconds, then pause because we had to remove Colsen from the top of a piece of furniture where he was dancing trying to get our attention. Play for 48 more seconds, then pause while Rayna asks a question. Play for 17 more seconds until the phone rings with a call that Pete has to take concerning something important. Play... pause no one can hear since Colsen is screaming his head off. Play while I go into the kitchen to get Colsen some milk.
Pause when I discover neither Strider nor Rayna finished their milk from dinner and it's still in cups on the counter. Play.... oh wait, now it's bedtime!
So we did this over several nights, but we finally finished it.
As I said, I had hoped this would spark all kinds of good family discussion about morals and values and other such things. However, the conversations ended up going slightly different than I expected...
At one point the coach (Jim Morris) is trying to make a significant point and he concludes by saying something to the effect of, "After all, there is more to life than baseball!" Amen, I thought! Let's talk about what's more important than sports! At the next "pause" opportunity (4 seconds later) I asked Strider what he thought about that statement.
"Of course there is!" he said. (I was relieved to hear him say that)
But....then he followed it up with... "Like Football!"
Then later in the movie, Jim Morris is struggling over his decision about whether or not to accept an offer to play on a real baseball team (minor league). He knows that if he goes, it will mean being away from his family for long stretches, and leaving a lot of responsibility on his wife. But, since playing in the big leagues has always been his true dream, he is in a quandary. We asked Strider what he thought about all that, wondering how he would weigh it out, what he would advise Jim Morris, etc. But all we got was, "He shoulda never got married!" (further cementing a long-standing resolution he's had that he will never get married)
Rayna, meanwhile, was pretty absent from our conversations about the meanings of the movie, since she got lost at the beginning when Jimmy was a boy, and then grew up to be a man.
Throughout the next several nights of the movie viewing she kept asking, "Where's Jimmy? That's Jimmy?" Too mind-blowing for her.
So my hopes and dreams of having meaningful conversations and bonding time over this movie did not come to fruition. I guess I should have had a more realistic view of the ages and stages of people within our family.
Oh well -- rookie mistake. :)
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