Me: Miles, do you know? Who won the First Punic War?
Me: Miles! America wasn't fighting in that war!
Miles: Then why are we even studying this???!!
Me: *blank stare*
Me: Ok, Colsen, do YOU know?
Colsen: Oh, I think it was that guy... King David? No, wait, who was that king that had that great teacher?
Me: You mean Alexander the Great?
Colsen: Yeah -- him!
Me: No, he died. GUYS. Remember what I JUST said?? The First Punic War was fought between Rome and Carthage! Who won? PICK ONE OF THOSE GROUPS I JUST SAID!
Colsen: Ummm... Rome???
I finally picked myself up off the floor enough to begin reading the new history section for today about the Second Punic War, wondering the whole time why I even bother.
Part way through, Miles ask, "So who are we rooting for here? I think I pick Carthage!"
History lessons are failing on all kinds of levels here....